{"id":13433,"date":"2025-09-15T08:07:00","date_gmt":"2025-09-15T08:07:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/?p=13433"},"modified":"2025-09-19T15:50:55","modified_gmt":"2025-09-19T15:50:55","slug":"the-importance-of-tochachah-rebuke","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/the-importance-of-tochachah-rebuke\/","title":{"rendered":"The Importance Of Tochachah – Rebuke"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Ask the Rabbi with Rabbi Chaim Mintz<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
\n

Do I have to protest when I see someone doing something wrong? I feel like it\u2019s none of my business, and it makes me very uncomfortable and often creates resentment.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

Rabbi Chaim Mintz responds:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

What is Tochachah?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Tochachah<\/a><\/em>\u2014rebuking a fellow Jew who does something against the Torah (bible), is a mitzvah<\/em> (commandment). Although on the surface it may seem harsh or intrusive, it is really an act of love. That\u2019s why the Torah places this mitzvah<\/em> right next to the mitzvah<\/em> of \u201cVe\u2019ahavta lerei\u2019acho kamocha<\/em>\u2014Love your fellow as yourself\u201d (Vayikra<\/em> 19:18<\/a>). The Jewish people are one family, and as family, we take responsibility for one another. Of course, this must be done with care,<\/a> love, and wisdom, in a way that can be heard and accepted.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Torah\u2019s Command<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

The Torah commands us to take action when someone is in danger: \u201cLo ta\u2019amod al dam rei\u2019echa<\/em><\/a>\u2014do not stand by your fellow\u2019s blood\u201d (ibid. 19:16). This obligation applies not only to physical danger but also to spiritual harm. It\u2019s not enough to feel concern\u2014we must act. That\u2019s the essence of tochachah<\/em>\u2014not criticism, but an attempt to save someone from spiritual harm.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And just as we would dive into freezing water to save someone from drowning, so too must we step in to protect a fellow Jew\u2019s soul, even when it is difficult or uncomfortable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It Takes Courage To Rebuke<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Don\u2019t back down just because someone resents it. Just as a parent disciplines a child because that is what\u2019s best for the child, whether or not he appreciates it, we must continue to give tochachah<\/em> for the benefit of the person who needs it. Furthermore, though he may resent it now, he will eventually come to value it, if not in This world then the Next.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

During World War II, some Jews were on a harrowing sea journey trying to escape Europe. One man, overwhelmed by despair, tried to take his life, and jumped overboard. Seeing what had happened, one of the other passengers dove into the frigid waters and pulled him back aboard. Eventually they survived, and the man was able to rebuild his life. Needless to say, his initial resentment turned to profound appreciation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Similarly, though tochachah <\/em>may be resented at first, like the rescued man, the one rebuked will eventually thank you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Thankful In Hindsight<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

In fact, if you keep quiet, in the World to Come that person may come with a bitter complaint: \u201cWhy didn\u2019t you say anything? Why didn\u2019t you help me when I still had a chance?\u201d Many people have the potential for greatness but need a gentle nudge\u2014someone to steer them back on course. When no one steps up, that potential can be lost. A small word at the right moment could have changed everything.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That\u2019s why truly great people welcome rebuke. Our own flaws are difficult to see, so while a compliment may feel good, a sincere, thoughtful critique is worth so much more, as it helps us grow. Indeed, our rabbis teach that a true friend is someone who points out your mistakes and helps you get back on track.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While giving rebuke is primarily to help others, we\u2019re helping ourselves too. \u201cKol Yisroel areivim zeh bazeh<\/a><\/em>\u2014all Jews are responsible and accountable for one another.\u201d As the kabbalists explain, our souls are all interconnected: one Jew\u2019s mitzvah lifts us all, while a sin drags us down. So giving tochachah<\/em> isn\u2019t meddling\u2014it\u2019s quite literally our business, as it\u2019s helping them and protecting ourselves.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In short: Rebuke comes from love\u2014to help the other person and ourselves. It must be done even if they don\u2019t appreciate it, but in truth, down the line they will thank you for it, in this world or in the World to Come.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Written by Rabbi Aaron Shapiro<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n
Learn more about Jewish perspectives and education with a TorahMate. Sign up for a weekly learning partner today!<\/a><\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n

Have another question to ask a rabbi<\/a>? You can ask Rabbi Mintz your own question at asktherabbi@oorah.org<\/a>, or head to oorah.org\/asktherabbi\/<\/a> to watch the latest Q&As or join Ask the Rabbi Live, Tuesdays at 9PM ET.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Ask the Rabbi with Rabbi Chaim Mintz Do I have to protest when I see someone doing something wrong? I feel like it\u2019s none of my business, and it makes […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":13438,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"sfsi_plus_gutenberg_text_before_share":"","sfsi_plus_gutenberg_show_text_before_share":"","sfsi_plus_gutenberg_icon_type":"","sfsi_plus_gutenberg_icon_alignemt":"","sfsi_plus_gutenburg_max_per_row":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[598,702,8,701],"tags":[252],"class_list":["post-13433","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-ask-the-rabbi","category-jewish-philosophy","category-judaism-101","category-mitzvot","tag-ask-the-rabbi"],"yoast_head":"\nThe Importance Of Tochachah - Rebuke - Jewish Resources<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Tochochah: rebuke protects the soul, strengthens community, and fulfills our duty to each other as a united nation.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/the-importance-of-tochachah-rebuke\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"The Importance Of Tochachah - Rebuke - Jewish Resources\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Tochochah: rebuke protects the soul, strengthens community, and fulfills our duty to each other as a united nation.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/the-importance-of-tochachah-rebuke\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Jewish Resources\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/torahmates\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2025-09-15T08:07:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2025-09-19T15:50:55+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/09\/Gemini_Generated_Image_dj0h2adj0h2adj0h.png\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1408\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"736\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/png\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"TorahMates\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@oorah\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@oorah\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"TorahMates\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"4 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/the-importance-of-tochachah-rebuke\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/the-importance-of-tochachah-rebuke\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"TorahMates\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/#\/schema\/person\/df1cd798c41777159e9fee85cb392ef9\"},\"headline\":\"The Importance Of Tochachah – Rebuke\",\"datePublished\":\"2025-09-15T08:07:00+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2025-09-19T15:50:55+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/the-importance-of-tochachah-rebuke\/\"},\"wordCount\":745,\"commentCount\":0,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/#organization\"},\"keywords\":[\"ask the rabbi\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Ask the Rabbi\",\"Jewish Philosophy\",\"Judaism 101\",\"Mitzvot\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/the-importance-of-tochachah-rebuke\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/the-importance-of-tochachah-rebuke\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/the-importance-of-tochachah-rebuke\/\",\"name\":\"The Importance Of Tochachah - Rebuke - Jewish Resources\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2025-09-15T08:07:00+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2025-09-19T15:50:55+00:00\",\"description\":\"Tochochah: rebuke protects the soul, strengthens community, and fulfills our duty to each other as a united nation.\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/the-importance-of-tochachah-rebuke\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/the-importance-of-tochachah-rebuke\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/the-importance-of-tochachah-rebuke\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"The Importance Of Tochachah – Rebuke\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/\",\"name\":\"JEWISH RESOURCES by Oorah's TorahMates\",\"description\":\"brought to you by Oorah's TorahMates\",\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/#organization\"},\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Organization\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/#organization\",\"name\":\"TorahMates\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/\",\"logo\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/tm.jpg\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/tm.jpg\",\"width\":921,\"height\":824,\"caption\":\"TorahMates\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/\"},\"sameAs\":[\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/torahmates\",\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/oorah\",\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/torahmates\/\",\"https:\/\/www.linkedin.com\/company\/oorah-inc?original_referer=https:\/\/www.oorah.org\/\",\"https:\/\/www.pinterest.com\/oorah\/\",\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/user\/OorahKR\",\"https:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Oorah_(organization)\"]},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/#\/schema\/person\/df1cd798c41777159e9fee85cb392ef9\",\"name\":\"TorahMates\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/26e85981eb7a7ffe0e513841f5d6b26a09f4f1ab01d3eff73b79b111f5b3a80c?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/26e85981eb7a7ffe0e513841f5d6b26a09f4f1ab01d3eff73b79b111f5b3a80c?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"TorahMates\"}}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"The Importance Of Tochachah - Rebuke - Jewish Resources","description":"Tochochah: rebuke protects the soul, strengthens community, and fulfills our duty to each other as a united nation.","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/the-importance-of-tochachah-rebuke\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"The Importance Of Tochachah - Rebuke - Jewish Resources","og_description":"Tochochah: rebuke protects the soul, strengthens community, and fulfills our duty to each other as a united nation.","og_url":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/the-importance-of-tochachah-rebuke\/","og_site_name":"Jewish Resources","article_publisher":"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/torahmates","article_published_time":"2025-09-15T08:07:00+00:00","article_modified_time":"2025-09-19T15:50:55+00:00","og_image":[{"width":1408,"height":736,"url":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/09\/Gemini_Generated_Image_dj0h2adj0h2adj0h.png","type":"image\/png"}],"author":"TorahMates","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_creator":"@oorah","twitter_site":"@oorah","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"TorahMates","Est. reading time":"4 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/the-importance-of-tochachah-rebuke\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/the-importance-of-tochachah-rebuke\/"},"author":{"name":"TorahMates","@id":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/#\/schema\/person\/df1cd798c41777159e9fee85cb392ef9"},"headline":"The Importance Of Tochachah – Rebuke","datePublished":"2025-09-15T08:07:00+00:00","dateModified":"2025-09-19T15:50:55+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/the-importance-of-tochachah-rebuke\/"},"wordCount":745,"commentCount":0,"publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/#organization"},"keywords":["ask the rabbi"],"articleSection":["Ask the Rabbi","Jewish Philosophy","Judaism 101","Mitzvot"],"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"CommentAction","name":"Comment","target":["https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/the-importance-of-tochachah-rebuke\/#respond"]}]},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/the-importance-of-tochachah-rebuke\/","url":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/the-importance-of-tochachah-rebuke\/","name":"The Importance Of Tochachah - Rebuke - Jewish Resources","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/#website"},"datePublished":"2025-09-15T08:07:00+00:00","dateModified":"2025-09-19T15:50:55+00:00","description":"Tochochah: rebuke protects the soul, strengthens community, and fulfills our duty to each other as a united nation.","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/the-importance-of-tochachah-rebuke\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/the-importance-of-tochachah-rebuke\/"]}]},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/the-importance-of-tochachah-rebuke\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"The Importance Of Tochachah – Rebuke"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/","name":"JEWISH RESOURCES by Oorah's TorahMates","description":"brought to you by Oorah's TorahMates","publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/#organization"},"potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":"required name=search_term_string"}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Organization","@id":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/#organization","name":"TorahMates","url":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/tm.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/tm.jpg","width":921,"height":824,"caption":"TorahMates"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/"},"sameAs":["https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/torahmates","https:\/\/twitter.com\/oorah","https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/torahmates\/","https:\/\/www.linkedin.com\/company\/oorah-inc?original_referer=https:\/\/www.oorah.org\/","https:\/\/www.pinterest.com\/oorah\/","https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/user\/OorahKR","https:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Oorah_(organization)"]},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/#\/schema\/person\/df1cd798c41777159e9fee85cb392ef9","name":"TorahMates","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/26e85981eb7a7ffe0e513841f5d6b26a09f4f1ab01d3eff73b79b111f5b3a80c?s=96&d=mm&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/26e85981eb7a7ffe0e513841f5d6b26a09f4f1ab01d3eff73b79b111f5b3a80c?s=96&d=mm&r=g","caption":"TorahMates"}}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13433","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=13433"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13433\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":13607,"href":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13433\/revisions\/13607"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/13438"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=13433"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=13433"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=13433"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}