Ask the Rabbi with Rabbi Chaim Mintz
We are constantly being told to feel the pain of Jews who are suffering, whether it’s during the current war in Israel or any other situation. Why is it so important to join in the pain of our brethren? After all, it doesn’t ease their suffering, so why have two Jews in pain instead of one?
Rabbi Chaim Mintz responds:
Being nosei b’ol im chaveiro, sharing in the burden of others by feeling their pain, is a fundamental Jewish value, and one of the 48 qualities enumerated in Pirkei Avot (6:6) as prerequisites for acquiring Torah.
Moshe Rabbeinu’s Example of Empathy
Indeed, Moshe Rabbeinu (Moses)’s first recorded act in the Torah was stepping out of the comfort of the king’s palace, and going to witness and feel the suffering of his fellow Jews in Mitzrayim (Egypt) (Shemot 2:11).
Moshe was actually emulating one of the Divine attributes. When Hashem (God) first appeared to Moshe, it was through a burning sneh, thorn bush (Shemot 3:2). As Rashi explains, the thorn bush symbolizes that Hashem is with us even in our suffering, feeling our pain amidst the “thorns.”
Why Shared Pain Matters
On a basic level, sharing in the pain of others offers those suffering some level of solace. As the saying goes, “tzorat rabim chatzi nechamah”—a shared sorrow is a partial relief. The simple knowledge that others are standing by them in their time of suffering eases the burden, so by showing them that they are not alone, you are providing comfort.
Empathy Should Inspire Action
Being nosei b’ol also inspires us to act. Our sages teach that Moshe’s empathy extended beyond mere compassion; he literally went out to the fields to help shoulder their burden. Similarly, our pain should propel us to assist in any way possible. While direct physical aid may not always be feasible, increased Torah study and prayer offer essential spiritual support and protection for the Jewish nation at all times.
But the purpose of feeling the pain of others is not just for the ones who are suffering; it is equally important for us. Just as a person naturally feels the pain of family members, he must extend that feeling of connection to the entire Jewish nation—our brothers and sisters. Too many people celebrate the joys and successes of others, but tend to disappear when they are in pain. The mark of a person who is truly connected with the Jewish people is one who connects with both the joy and the suffering of others. And since we are the nation of Hashem, strengthening our bond with each other will bring us closer to Hashem as well.
Connecting Across Generations
This explains the purpose of sharing in the pain of previous generations, such as eating maror (bitter herbs) at the Pesach seder to remember the pain of the Jews in Egypt. Some might ask, “It’s history; what does it have to do with me?” But it does matter, because Klal Yisrael (the Jewish nation) is not just a people of the present; it is a continuity of the past, present, and future. By doing things like visiting places like Yad Vashem and reading about past suffering and feeling their pain, we are not merely connecting to history, we are deepening our bond with our nation
It’s About Us, Too
In truth, connecting to the Jewish people by sharing in their pain can itself help ease their suffering, even if they know nothing about it. Hashem’s Presence resides more powerfully among the Jewish people collectively than with any individual alone, and the more we are unified and connected, the more we draw Hashem’s Presence into our midst, bringing His blessing and protection to all who are in need.
In Short
Sharing in the pain of the Jewish people is important because it provides comfort and inspires action. It also strengthens our connection to the Jewish nation, which brings us closer to Hashem and helps bring blessing and protection to those who are suffering.
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