Ask the Rabbi with Rabbi Chaim Mintz
I am considering going to a hotel for Pesach (Passover) that offers a full program of speakers and activities. I think it will provide a nice break for my family, while sparing us all the Pesach cleaning and preparation. Is there any reason not to go?
Rabbi Chaim Mintz responds:
The Ideal: Celebrating Pesach at Home
While a hotel program can seem appealing, as a rule, a person should celebrate Pesach at home rather than go to a hotel. Actively preparing for Pesach as a family is a valuable source of spiritual growth and a key part of the emotional connection to the holiday.
The Value of Doing a Mitzvah Yourself
There is a principle “mitzvah bo yoter mibeshlucho — a mitzvah performed by oneself is greater than one performed through an agent.” Performing a mitzvah (Torah commandment) ourselves, rather than finding a way to offload it, demonstrates how much we value and cherish it. Indeed, we find that the Tribe of Levi was instructed to transport the holy vessels of the Mishkan in the Wilderness on their shoulders instead of placing them more conveniently on wagons (see Bamidbar 7:9).
Being Personally Involved in Preparation
This extends beyond the actual performance of the mitzvah; it also means that a person should be as directly involved as possible in mitzvah preparation, such as building a sukkah or taking part in baking matzot. In fact, the Shulchan Aruch (Orach Chaim 250:1) describes how the sages of the Talmud would personally involve themselves in the Shabbat preparations, chopping vegetables, preparing firewood, lighting the fire, and arranging the home, even though others could have done these tasks for them.
The Spiritual Power of Effort
Moreover, the Arizal teaches that toiling and sweating for a mitzvah, especially when baking matzos, connects the body to the mitzvah, purifying and sanctifying it.
Embracing the Work of Pesach
The same applies to all the Pesach preparations. Rather than taking the easy way out, we should embrace the work of cleaning the house, preparing the food, and arranging everything for the Seder. By being directly involved, we not only show how deeply we value the mitzvot of Pesach but also gain a deeper appreciation for them, and sanctify ourselves in the process.
Building Family Connection and Joy
Furthermore, so much of the joy of Pesach comes from preparing together as a family. Everyone works together to clean the house and make it chametz-free, transforming it into a home worthy of this holy Yom Tov, thereby building anticipation and a growing sense of excitement for Pesach. Then, on Erev Pesach (Passover Eve), everyone participates in preparing for the Seder: making charoset, mixing the salt water, arranging the Seder plate, and laying out the finest dishes and wine goblets. All this hard work creates a strong sense of achievement and satisfaction that makes the Seder so much more enjoyable.
These shared experiences are what create lasting memories that the children will carry with them for years to come, and will help prepare them for when they have a family of their own.
When a Hotel May Be the Right Choice
However, there are situations where going to a hotel may be the right choice. For example, the elderly or ill, or someone who is completely overwhelmed, may not be able to properly prepare for Pesach at home. Similarly, someone who is alone or does not know how to run his own Seder, or will be more spiritually uplifted in a structured program, would be better off joining a group to celebrate Pesach.
Choosing the Right Program
If you do choose to go to a hotel, remember that not all programs are equal. Some are too loud and chaotic for a proper Seder, and others lack a suitable shul where one can daven and learn properly. Make sure the program is set up so you can have a spiritually uplifting experience.
Each person must consider his or her situation carefully and choose the approach that will provide the most meaningful and spiritually rewarding experience.
In Short
As a rule, staying home is ideal, since actively participating in the Pesach preparations deepens our connection to Pesach and makes it more joyful and memorable. When preparing at home isn’t practical, or going to a program would be more spiritually uplifting, it is appropriate.
Written by Rabbi Aaron Shapiro
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